Pain

By Mackenzie Anderson

You’re used because it’s easy. They don’t love you because they don’t see you as a person. Just a short time happiness. You’re a placeholder. You’re the pit stop in between states for gas. They don’t see you for the person you are. You’re just someone to them. A person who can be what they want to be. A person that they play with when they’re bored. A doll. They don’t care about your back story. Or the scar on your cheek. They probably didn’t even realize your one eye is smaller than the other. They don’t care if you end up hurt in the process, it’s just a game to them. You’re not on their mind as much as they’re on yours. They don’t try like you do. They will drop you like “I love you” meant nothing. They’ll forget you exist faster than you can type “WHY”. You are the one who has to question your worth. You overthink for hours and hours on why you weren’t enough for them. You can’t stop thinking about what’s wrong with you. And that’s where it starts… the countless nights crying, the self hatred, the pain. You’re the one who has to pick up the pieces, but when do you stop and think that it’s not fair. When do things change and you get that perfect cliche guy who actually cares? When does the pain end and the loving begin? If you know the answers let me know. Until then I’ll go back to picking up the pieces.